Published 12/18/2025

Relearning Common Courtesies in the Workplace

As new members are phased in to the workforce, gentle but firm reminders about workplace etiquette and what is considered respectful behavior can go a long way.

Matthew Kirchner

Columnist, Host of the TechEd Podcast, President of ATS/LAB Midwest

I blame this partially on the pandemic. They missed so many experiences being locked up in their bedrooms, quarantined from their classmates, sentenced to classes taught on Zoom with no personal interaction and thus missed the opportunity to learn basic workplace skills. Once society reopened they were so far behind in the honing of previously innate courtesies that they never caught up.

“Josh” (not his real name), I countered, “Never in a million years would I tell you that you couldn’t take a day off for a trip with your family, but you can’t just unilaterally declare that you have decided to skip a day of work. Basic professional courtesy dictates that you would ask for the day off.”

“Matt, would it be OK if I took the day off on Friday to go on a trip with my family?”

“Of course.”

This isn’t just about taking a day off. One recent Friday afternoon, I went looking for two newer team members around 2:30 in the afternoon, only to find that they had cut out early without saying anything. Neither realized that this would be a professional faux pas.

Conduct during virtual meetings is another example. My rule of thumb: If you wouldn’t do it in an in-person meeting, don’t do it in a virtual meeting. This practice seems to be lost on those entering the workforce as well. It starts with having their cameras off. It’s a meeting, we want to see you!

We find they think it’s OK to text others during meetings or even work on something else while sitting in the virtual meeting. Mid-meeting, some stand up and walk away from their computer, only to return a few minutes later with a warm cup of coffee in hand. None of this would have been acceptable in an in-person meeting, and to me it’s not OK in a virtual meeting either.

And what about in-person meetings? I’ve witnessed many, in the middle of a presentation or meeting, open their computer and work on something completely separate. Ten years ago, nobody would have gotten away with this. Today, it’s commonplace.

There are other behaviors many of young professionals haven’t learned, including the importance of being punctual for meetings, or that missing a meeting altogether is a major blunder. In my days of reporting to boards or, before, to presidents or vice presidents, if a board member or senior team member reached out via phone or email, they would hear back from me nearly immediately. This included weekends and holidays. These days, I have found myself shocked and frustrated when I text or email someone in the middle of the week and they don’t respond for a day. What?

Another practice I’ve mentioned in these pages before is that of delegating up.

“Can you take a look at that proposal I put together for Customer X and correct any mistakes you catch?”

“No! Get it to where you think it’s perfect and then I’ll review it.”

All is not lost. We’ve found a solution. Now when we bring new-generation members onto the team, we tell them right away that there will be workplace courtesies we would expect them to know that they might not have learned before. We make COVID-19 the culprit so as not to embarrass them. Then we tell them that when we see behaviors that aren’t appropriate in the workplace we will politely and calmly let them know. All we expect is that they adjust their behavior at the time and in the future.

Returning professional behavior to the workplace will require industry effort. There are three steps to do it:

Decide that unprofessional behavior won’t be tolerated.
Politely put new team members on notice that errors in courtesies will be called out.
Gently point them out when they happen and expect professionalism going forward.

Join me in these efforts to re-educate and instill these workplace courtesies.